Monday, June 05, 2006

 

UPM Throws Party for Garduch!

03 June 2006
UP Mountaineers Victory Party for Romi “Garduch” Garduce
Filinvest I Clubhouse

1. Kakaibang UPM party ang naranasan ko nu’ng Saturday. Airconditioned venue, may buffet complete with roast beef, lechon, free-flowing drinks (including red wine)!

2. Plus ang dami-dami ko pang nakitang mga old faces. It was overwhelming to see so many people who are still proud (heck, now even more prouder) to be part of the UP Mountaineers. Sabi nga ng ever-present founder Boboy Francisco, isa pang achievement ni Garduch ang i-compel ang mga matagal nang inactive members to go back and re-establish ties with the org. Most especially now that we are gearing up for the 30th anniversary!

3. It was especially thrilling for me to see Bunny kasi institusyon na siya sa UPM at that night ko lang siya nakita. Hindi ko nga lang siya na-meet. Next time magpapakilala na’ko sa kanya. At least si Joey Cuerdo na isa pang institusyon naalala pa’ko. (Kilig!)

4. Tuwang-tuwa ako sa open forum na pinaghandaan nina Ian, Ninoy, and this other member whose name, unfortunately, I did not catch but he sure did a great Abner Mercado. Ninoy even came with props. Panalo pa ‘yung pinatanong kay GMA reporter Ruth Cabal kung ilang beses nag-tebats si Garduch sa bundok. (Tsismis lang: nakasabay ko si Ruth Cabal sa elevator sa GMA from the homecoming dinner for Garduch at tinutukso siya talaga ng mga kasamahan niya kay Garduch. Apparently, crush na crush niya si Garduch! Yiheee!)

5. Gusto ko rin ‘yung personalized nametags. Mine read “Hi! I’m Rey! Brokeback Mountaineer.”

6. Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Too bad I had to leave early I’m sure marami akong na-miss that night.

7. Mabuhay ka, Garduch! Mabuhay ang UP Mountaineers! Kita-kita tayo sa Anniv Run!

 

ADOBO NA NAMAN?!

My high school best friend recently broke up with his college-aged boyfriend dahil sawa na siya sa adobo. He wanted an open relationship, the young boy wasn’t, well, open to it.

My friend admitted that he has cheated with his boyfriend so I didn’t see why he wanted an open relationship. As far as the dynamics are concerned, he was getting what he wanted anyway. At the same time, I didn’t see how his boyfriend could insist on a monogamous relationship when obviously his partner wasn’t keen on maintaining one. There are so many things I couldn’t see, no?

There’s a little bit of my best friend in me. And there’s a little bit of his ex-boyfriend in me. Siguro every gay man suffers from this split personality. We want the fairy tale – the romance, the commitment, growing old together. But we also want the porn movie – one-night stands, fuck buddies, anonymous sex. Puwede ba bot?

I think puwede.

Ang pinakamalaking issue lang dito, eh, sex. Madalas kasi masyadong malaking weight ang nilalagay natin sa sex. Sa relationship ito ang napagdidiskitahan. Siguro dahil ito na ang pinaka-tangible manifestation ng mga tama at mali sa isang relasyon. Pero ang pagkakaroon ng iisang concept kung ano ba dapat ang sex, gaano ito kahalaga, at ano ang ibig-sabihin nito sa isang relationship ang nagiging source ng away.

Well, iba naman talaga ang dynamics at social expectations in a heterosexual relationship so hindi ko na ‘yun pakikiaalaman. Pero among gay men, sa tingin ko ang sikreto para mag-last ang isang relationship, ay I-CONTEXTUALIZE NATIN ANG SEX. Hindi pare-pareho ang sex sa atin. Merong libog sex lang, subok lang sex, sex dahil kung i-test kung bagay kayo, sex kasi mahal kita…

Sex is important in a romantic relationship. It’s one of many things that separate your relationship from the one you have with others. In this context, importante na sexually compatible kayo and that you are physically attracted to each other. You’d have to want to have sex with your partner. Pero hindi lang sa sex nakasalalay ang relationship. And’yan ‘yung nakakapag-usap kayo nang matagal. ‘Yung narerespect n’yo ang pagkatao ng bawat isa - ang trabaho, pananaw sa mundo, pangarap, opinyon ninyo.

But while sex can be important, meron pang ibang context ito. Ito ‘yung just sex. Wala lang. Cute ka, you think I’m cute, too. Why not? Sa ganyang context, kung makipag-sex ang partner ko sa ibang lalaki, hindi nu’n madi-diminish ang love namin sa isa’t isa, nor ang bond na shine-share namin. Wala lang sex can be the other ulam na lalong nagpapasarap sa adobo.

Kanya-kanyang timpla na lang siguro ang bawat tao, bawat magkarelasyon sa sinasabi kong CONTEXTUALIZATION OF SEX. Para sa’kin, ayos na’ko sa “open relationship that’s not so open”. Sort of a “relaxed monogamy.”

Sa ganitong set-up, I still wouldn’t go out and tell my partner about my other sexual exploits because I wouldn’t want to hear about his. We don’t need to know everything about each other, don’t we? Mas marami pa kaming puwedeng pag-usapan. What you do in your own time is your business. As long as you’re not bumping off dates just to sleep with the new hottie, or you’re having SEB’s at my pad, bahala ka sa buhay mo. And, chances are, if it’s just wala lang sex, I’d probably forget about it and not consider it worth telling my partner. Ngayon kapag na-i-in-love ka na, that’s when you have to talk about it kasi involved na’yung partner mo ru’n, eh.

 

AN AUTHENTIC GHOST STORY

Nag-planning ang S-Files sa Holiday Inn Resort, Clark, Pampanga nu’ng Monday (29 May 2006). Hanggang Wednesday dapat kami ru’n pero ‘yung ilang bosing kelangang umuwi that same night dahil may early meeting pa sila the next day sa Manila.

Katabi ni Kokoy (Creative Consultant) ang driver sa GMA pick-up. Nasa likod naman sina Direk Rico at ang aming PM na si Ms Enri. Mga bandang alas-tres na sila lumarga. Nagkukuwentuhan sila kaya medyo naka-sideview si Kokoy sa kanyang upuan habang kausap niya ‘yung iba. Actually, sa kanyang kuwento ito. Tinawagan ko talaga siya nang malaman ko na naka-encounter nga sila ng kung ano dahil ito pa lang ang second ghost story na maririnig ko na authentic talaga base sa credibility ng taong nagkukuwento, at sa lapit ng degree ng relationship ko sa kanya. First-hand account ito! (At tinaon kong meeting ngayon habang sinusulat ko ‘to dahil kapag sinulat ko ‘to nang mag-isa kikilabutan ako.)

Nasa madalim na bahagi sila ng highway ng Angeles. Mabilis daw ang takbo nila nang biglang sa peripheral ni Kokoy napansin niyang may tao sa windshield. Obviously wala naman silang nabangga para magkaroon ng lalake du’n pero inisip niya na baka namamalik-mata lang siya. Lalakeng long-hair, mukha raw haggard ang mukha. Nakaitim na t-shirt. Mga limang segundo raw ‘tong nag-hover sa windshield bago ito nawala. Hindi nagsalita si Kokoy. Pero ang driver humirit ng “Ano ‘yun?” Tumili na si Kokoy! Nakita rin ng driver the exact same guy sa kanilang windshield…Awoooo!

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